Choke

Basically, anything Chuck Palahniuk does is given higher regard, in that: if it looked terrible I may not watch it. But if it looks terrible and he's attached, then I'll watch it. But to be honest, this project is worth watching without Chuck being involved. Perhaps the most attention-grabbing aspect of this film is that it features not only Sam Rockwell, but Community's Brita, in all her glory. Take that how you will.

When you sit down and watch an adaptation of Chuck's work, you know you're into something else. Fight Club was odd, beautiful and mind-bending. But it barely scratched the surface of how wretched, twisted and perverse his other material can be. And I can say this safely because from just reading one other book of his, a collection of tied together short stories in Haunted. They are also incredibly fascinating.

The first thing that you notice in the movie is the use of support groups and how they take full focus. Again, you get a bit of it in Fight Club as it serves as a catalyst for the unnamed narrator. Every character in this movie is so severely broken, but you can't feel bad for them. They are pretty vile. The movie starts out with some nasty storytelling, as we go around the circle of a sex addiction support group. And that's where you really see some of Chuck's more shocking pieces come out, but over the course of the movie it gets watered down. I can't help but think about the process involved here as the director adapts the novel for the screen, and slowly ventures away from the source material. And now I have to read the story to see what really happens.

It's not necessarily a bad thing though. Chuck even said about Fight Club that he thought it was an improvement upon his own material, but in that case he left the book in the hands of a visionary (re: David Fincher). There was certainly some narrative here but nothing that really popped off the screen. As I mentioned the characters are despicable, and it's really about reform. Rockwell's protagonist is a sex addict who spends most of time goofing off at work and visiting his mother in a nursing home. Through a series of flashbacks to Victor's childhood we get a broader portrait of how he came to be how he is today. He involves himself with people who seem to care, and he starts to care for someone too. This seems to be the primary focus; he distances himself from a friend who seems to be getting better (from his own addiction) due to jealousy, I'm sure. The same thing is happening to him too, but he fights it hard and lives in denial. But as this denial gets in the way of his own addiction, he's forced to come to terms with his situation.

This coming to terms is represented by Step Four of the addiction counselling. This is where I think the movie is partly aimed at people who have at least some familiarity with this stuff, and I have to say I have no way to relate to this stuff at all. I don't know anybody who has gone through any kind of steps-based program, so I have no idea what Step Four could possibly be. Perhaps it doesn't matter: it's clearly a major stepping stone towards rehabilitation, and a turning point for our main character. I'm not sure I enjoyed the movie, but I can appreciate it. I felt dirty afterwards, as well you should after watching or reading any of these insights into Chuck's dirty worlds.

Father's Day Bioshock 2

How fitting it is that I finish the game on Father's Day, of all days. As you control one of the first Big Daddies - Delta - seeking out your original Little Sister, you can explore the bonds of that father-daughter relationship. Or perhaps, you shouldn't be taking cues from a videogame where you, as the dad, are playing a grotesque monster who has been revived after being dead for ten years and living inside a steampunk style pressurized diving suit. Oh, and you inject yourself with various plasmids that alter your genetic code, enabling you to shoot fire, ice and electricity - among others - from your hand. Yeah, it is quite the ride and when you start thinking of these game worlds and the characters you play from a distance, you can completely understand some groups' apprehension towards the gaming industry. But that's all besides the point, cause the important thing here is your exploration of Rapture, it's inhabitants and your role as a Big Daddy.

I made a post last week detailing one specific story where I was in awe of the game; since then I have been playing the game religiously until I completed it a few days later. And I walk away in complete love of the game, and the series. As I previously mentioned there seems to be a bit of hate on for the sequel, and I can understand why. The story isn't as good, and the gameplay is similar. But I can't see how that's a bad thing. The story is intriguing and way beyond your average game. The gameplay is stellar; they took the already polished mechanics of the first and refined them even further. Allowing you to control a plasmid and weapon at the same time; advancing you with different weapons and more interesting upgrades, and providing an absolute boatload of plasmids and gene tonics. So many tonics, in fact, I was going crazy managing them. I wanted to equip them all. In the first game I don't think I even bothered to max out the slots while here, it was an absolute priority. I enjoy the hacking mini-game much more, not only because it was faster, but it didn't pause the game and seemed to play a more important role in the game. I was eager to turn bots against each other and allow them to help me. The ability to repair them (and subsequently get them names) was a nice touch.

One of the issues I had was my luck of using all the weapons: for the most part I stuck to the machine and rivet gun. Rarely did I switch up the gun I used or even their specialty ammo, although I kind of wanted to. It just never happened. I also didn't focus on using a variety of plasmids either, sticking to the same few in most cases. But near the end I was beginning to branch out and wished the game would go on longer so that I could experiment more. This leads me to the question of repeating the game. Perhaps on a harder difficulty? Perhaps to max out my research this time? I missed the achievement by just an inch, as I kept forgetting to scan in the spider splicer whenever he jumped me. Instead I went nuts and killed his ass, then remembered that I should have made that snuff film before opening fire. The audio diaries are back and absolutely fantastic as they bring a lot of intriguing depth to the world and its characters.

Playing the game on Father's Day is certainly no replacement or replacement for the relationship you would have with your real daughter (or son, I guess, but there are none of those in Rapture), but it's something. I couldn't harm those Little Sisters if I wanted to. In the beginning I wasn't sure if they were impervious to damage. I would make sure they were out of harm's way before I devastated her Big Daddy. I never wanted her to get caught in the crossfire. And I defended them with a newfound vigor as they were gathering, making sure those jerk splicers got what they deserved. When it was time to let them go, I always "rescued" them (I've never even see the harvest animation) and waited patiently for them to go safely into the hole in the wall to freedom. The process of adopting, then doing the gatherings numerous times in a level become a little tedious at times, but was always worth it. And most definitely worth the trouble when you see them without those zombie-esque glowing eyes at the end of the game. They were safe now, and being a father, that's all you ever want for your children.

The Adjustment Bureau

This is a prime example of a movie trailer giving away the entire plot of the movie it's advertising. There should be a spoiler tag running on the reel before airing so you can cover your eyes and put in earplugs for the next two and a half minutes before your movie starts. So what happens, is this guy, running for some political office meets a girl - the girl, that is - and proceeds to run into her a couple of times. But apparently, he's not supposed to have met this girl, or see her again. This is where the sci-fi comes in as we're introduced to these group of suit and hat wearing group of mysterious guys, who have neat notebooks that chart out the path of people's lives. For Matt Damon, he's veering off the path and these guys are none too please, but he says "forget it, I'm going to fall in love with this girl" regardless of the warnings that it destroys his (political) life. The end of the trailer essentially has him and the girl running through a variety of settings, all the while Matt Damon is wearing this pretty cool (but odd) hat.

And, that's basically the movie. Sure, there's a lot of filler and some interesting stuff - plot, character development, etc - but you got the whole thing in two minutes thirty seconds anyway. The terrible thing is you know you got it all beforehand, but you're compelled to watch anyway. Rightly so, this movie wreaks of covert sci-fi which I would like to coin the term. This is when a movie with some pretty heavy science fiction elements masks itself as a romantic comedy or some such genre so as to appeal to more people. Your sci-fi radar goes off, just as it did with the Adjustment trailer and you (or me, I guess) get really excited. You think: sure, they'll pull in the mainstream audience and then pull the hood off and give me some mind bending science fiction. But you run the risk of getting something like Kate and Leopold or The Invention of Lying, where the quality sci-fi doesn't really materialize. The Adjustment Bureau would be different though, right? I mean, these guys are mysterious and wearing hats, you can't just let that stuff slide.

So, does Adjustment's science fiction materialize? Sure, it does, but it's not the primary focus nor should it be. This movie is well crafted enough and intriguing that you don't really need the answers that the movie provides. And therein lies one issue: too many questions answered. In fact, they don't even try to be mysterious, but quite blatent instead. I was really expecting to be bombarded with "answers" towards the end of the movie, but in the first conversation with a Bureau's "agent" you have an exact idea of what's up in this world. It's not necessarily a bad thing; one of the greatest elements of science fiction is how human and philosophical it can be. It can present viewpoints that you wouldn't normally explore, and leave you with something to think about afterwards. I won't necessarily walk away with a lot of thought-provoking inner dialogue here, but I did find the concepts intriguing. And, the movie was pretty solid.

What are some of the good things to come out of here? Well, it's a well acted movie; Damon can do no wrong. And now I want to see more of Emily Blunt. The chemistry between the two seemed pretty good, which is not something I would typically notice on in a movie, but sometimes when it really works it stands out to me. I kept thinking of Matt Damon's wife seeing the movie and wondering if their relationship sparked so much, but then I realize it's all make believe anyway. Sprinkle some thematic elements of free will (always popular nowadays) and destiny, then add in some great tidbits coming from the Bureau themselves, that is, the doors, and the hierarchy of the organization. As I was watching this with my buddy Cale, I could tell we are coming from the same mindset of science fiction lovers: in that interrogation scene with the agents they refer to the people they're following as "humans" and since it was one of the first bits of clue we were finding out about them, we both looked at each in excitement, knowing exactly what each other was thinking: "did he just say humans?! Then what are they!" Yeah, then it was kind of downhill from there in the excitement department. But, it was a very solid film.

Just for the Lulz

Do you see what's going on here? How secure is your password? Hacking has alway been thought of as an activity for dweebs grumping in a basement cavern, peering at numerous monitors by the glow blue and green computer lights through thick nerd glasses. The group has always been frowned upon, of course, but perhaps not taken entirely seriously. And why would they, when popular culture portrays a hacker in various lights: just look at various serials like Criminal Minds, NCIS and going back further, movies like the aptly named Hackers. The conspiracy theorist in me also likes to point out that large corporations have a certain profit in making hackers out to be such a bad thing, as does the government. They can benefit from a general negative perception, and indeed, they have succeeded in doing so. But there are glimmers of light and interesting factoids. Some hackers are reformed and come work for the good guys, beefing up security for your governments and companies, keeping your data, nay, your life safe from evil-doers.

It's all part of the act, you see. So what we have happening over the last couple of weeks is incredibly interesting. Various groups of hackers, hacking for various reasons. Some claim to do it for noble reasons, others, not so much. Some are making demands, like certain politicians to step down, or reverse decisions. And other groups, well, they'd doing it for the lulz. But who's laughing? Lulz Security is focusing on the companies of gamers, but aren't afraid to get into other areas. These groups are definitely knocking up a notch by bringing down and releasing government sites and records. With all the hacking going on, I feel like the entire USA is going bonkers. And perhaps it's because I keep on top of tech news (for the most part) that I hear so much about this. Does your average citizen know what's going on?

Let's back it up a bit here and really focus though on the big one, specifically, Sony. A few months ago these hackers breezed past Sony security and obtained the records of 77 million user accounts. Seventy seven million. Think about it for a second and let it sink in. You hear about other comprises where a few thousand accounts are affected. You think that's OK, you're not one of them. But if you have a Sony account, then your account is most definitely out there now. What does that mean to you? Perhaps you don't care about your Sony PlayStation Network account, but you should be concerned about what's in there. Your username. Your password. Do you use the same password on other services? Then you had better go change that password everywhere. Perhaps these groups are doing us a service as they bring into light how weak security is, and what you should be doing to protect yourself. Unique passwords for every site you belong to is a good start, but impossible to maintain a large number of without just writing them all down on a sheet of paper. That's where password managers come in, and I highly recommend you use one.

So where does it end? I'm not sure that it does. It will continue to happen as people discovery the possibilities of the anonymous blanket. The news that a trio of their fellow hackers were apprehended makes no difference; we could be talking about a group of a half dozen to hundreds or more. But it brings into light things that should matter to you as we move further into a digital age. What information do you have out there? How secure are the places you decide to store things? What steps should you take when your data has been compromised?

One thing is for sure though, is that they are pointing out how weak security can be at various companies. Sony was down for months as they tried to recover (and were being constantly attacked). In the end we all got a few free games out of it and can move on. I'm sure some of barely noticed at all.

Bioshock 2

My friend bought me the limited edition of Bioshock 2 which was, quite frankly, a pleasant surprise. The edition is nothing short of epic, and was the catalyst in getting me into the vinyl game. A hardcover book was the icing on the cake, and then the game, of course. Every day that I didn't play the game was slightly guilt-ridden, but there is a flood of high quality, must play games in line that were taking precedence. And of course, you have to switch it your gaming genres to keep things fresh. So after finally completing the arduous grind of (the story mode of) Lego Rock Band, I could finally move on. Perusing the shelves of games beckoning at me, my hand went towards Bioshock 2. With one finger, I pulled on the top, angling it out. The slightly exposed title had me thinking: do I tackle this? The original had me hooked for a week straight; I couldn't pull my hands off the controller. Would the sequel have the same effect?

Without a doubt this I have high expectations for this game, and in my casual reading over the past year I see a general sentiment of disappointment. What is it? The game just didn't live up to the first one in terms of character, story, atmosphere. Is that such a bad thing? What if these elements was only 95% of the original game? Considering how stellar the first one is, 95% of that would still be epic. In fact, if the game is only half as good I think we have a solid experience on our hands. And I'm glad to report that so far, this game is an awesome experience, and definitely not a disappointment. Perhaps I'm just being too realistic; I don't expect the exact same game, or even something of the same quality. And perhaps because of that, I'm allowed to enjoy the game more. Really though, why justify all this? There's a lot to enjoy here, but I want to share a quick story with you that had me in awe.

Part of the game is adopting Little Sisters and having them harvest bodies for adam. The harvesting process can take a couple of minutes, and inexplicably while this is happening, splicers (bad folk, for the uninitiated) come out of the woodwork to attack the little girl and get the adam for themselves (because the are all addicts). So it's your job, as the Big Daddy, to protect the Little Sister while she's doing this. I performed a few "gatherings" successfully: I would lay traps in all the entry points I could see, make sure my guns are loaded and ready for action. Sometimes there would be a turret nearby: you can hack it and make it work for you. But this one gathering was a bit different, because it was a little bit in the open. Flanked by a large open area and multiple halls, there were a lot of traps to lay but I knew the battle would be hard. After a couple of minutes setting up my traps I could hear the thud, thud, of another Big Daddy approaching. I saw in the distance a little girl prancing around him. But just as I had noticed where they were, I put my girl down to begin the harvest.

Other Big Daddy's are initially neutral to you; they only attack you if you attack them first. Which is nice, because they can be tough to kill and can be avoided. The pair were now travelling directly towards me, yet no splicers had appeared yet. The other little girl ran up to the body that my girl was harvesting. She stopped, put her hands on her hips and looked on in what seemed like disappointment as the body was already taken. Her Big Daddy caught up to her and started doing the moaning thing they always do. At this point I was ducking behind a counter watching this happen: hiding, thinking that perhaps the Big Daddy wouldn't see me. I wasn't sure what to expect, then the splicers poured in. And the Big Daddy was not pleased: he started killing them with deadly efficiency as I continued to hide. He was protecting his Little Sister and unknowingly (?) protecting mine too. I let out a couple of blasts whenever I could, making sure not to hit my new partner (he would instantly turn on me if I did). Before I knew it, my Little Sister was jumping up and down: she was done and wanted to get back onto my shoulders.

When I retrieved her the achievement popped: not taking damage during a gathering. Sweet! Then the splicers stopped, and the Big Daddy continued about his business lurching about. The final task after gathering is either rescuing the Little Sister or harvesting her; of course I rescued her and she went about her way. I turned around and my buddy was still thumping about. I needed another Little Sister to do more gatherings to complete the level, but do I take his? He was right there. So yes, I killed him. It wasn't an epic duel by any means; he was grossly overpowered. As he lay slumped on the floor, his Little Sister cried. I walked up to her, and she started jumping up and down in a complete change of emotion: she wanted to be adopted now. I pressed the X button the gamepad and she jumped up onto my shoulders, ready for another gathering adventure.

X-Men: First Class

The X-Men series of movies have been very solid all round. Ok, stop laughing. I haven't forgotten about X3, but I choose to downplay it's horribleness. That, and I thought Wolverine was decently entertaining. As far as superhero movies go and especially team ensemble movies, the first two X-Men movies have set the bar. The initial X-Men really did get the comic book thing into full gear. They handed the baton to Spider-Man who absolutely drove it into the ground and webbed a flag off it, thereby giving the Comic Book genre it's capital letters. So you have to take how weighty the X series has been over the years when you start talking about First Class.

Yet we still touch upon X3 because that's where the series went a little sour. It absolutely destroyed my confidence and more importantly, my expectations for any other mutant movies. Perhaps that's why Wolverine was OK in my books. When First Class was initially advertised, the trailer viewed and the concept udnerstood, there was much excitement. Not a lot mind you, as my capability of feeling excitement has declined quite a bit over the years. The last time I felt true giddiness from a movie was indeed Spider-Man. But I've always had a place in my heart for the X-Men because it's just plain fun watching these characters use their powers on the big screen. Finally, technology's special effects have caught up to a point where the pages from the comics can be conveyed on the screen in a way that won't make us laugh.

As is the way with comic book movies, there is no avoiding their arrival. You are inundated with media, and in part that's my own fault: I'm a nerd by heart and trade, and the news sources I tap into on a daily basis are going to be blasted into my brain on nearly a daily basis. I don't go out hunting for in-production shots of Transformers being filmed, but they are delivered to my doorstop and I'm forced to consume them. You can't avoid their arrival also, because these are the new event movies of the mid-nineties. You can thank Spider-Man and Batman for that. In my efforts to avoid saturation, I remained relatively clueless on this new X-Men movie, and instead, let me imagination run wild. I still watched the trailers and got the idea: the origins of the X-Men, back in the day when Professor X and Magneto were still buddies, and the backdrop was the Cuban Missile Crisis. We would get the original team, although "original" will be the topic of flamewars for the fanboys.

After nearly a year of previews and trailers, I found myself with actual plans to go see the movie on a Friday night. I was skeptical at first, of course, as I haven't been to a movie on Friday with my friend Cale in what seems like years, but also because his brother in law would be coming, who just welcomed his second child. Alas, it was happening and I found myself sitting in the theatre; after a short conversation about video games the topic quickly moved to children and the wonderful things they do. Sure, it sounds terrible but they don't have me scared; what really scares me is the behaviour of the people in the theatre while we were watching. I would gladly put up with an upset baby over these obnoxious nerd-teens. It's unbelievable how they could talk, at normal conversation level, for just about the entire film. The problem in this situation was not being able to tell them to be quiet, because we had two other groups doing the same thing. Some sounded younger, some older. It was like happy hour or something. And because of this, while walking away from the film I was a bit disappointed.

I was also disappointed that I barely recognized any of the characters, and my initial expectation that this was a reboot seemed to be full of lies. Yes, they managed to take into consideration the later movies by not showcasing anyone who couldn't age slowly (Mystique, Wolverine) or normally (Charles and Magneto, of course). We have Cyclops' brother, or father, or something. You thought you saw Nightcrawler? Nope, that's somebody else (probably his dad, I guess). I like the X-Men comics, but to a point. There's entirely way too many characters and lore to wrap my mind around, so that's not going to help with the confusion I felt on who these characters were. So something weird happened: I had to step back and watch this without my nerd-meter flying about wildly.

And when it comes down to it, I would have to say one negative thing. Sure, there are others but whatever, there were also a lot of cool scenes. Seeing these guys develop their power was interesting: they are still vulnerable and not all-powerful like they are in the later movies. Magneto is driven by rage but with a clear vision just as he does in the later movies. But he's still "human" at this point in his relationship with Charles Xavier and the movie definitely let you feel the conflict between chasing his vision and remaining friends. He's pretty evil, but not nearly as evil as he could be: Sebastian Shaw takes that crown to a whole new level. Kevin  Bacon plays pure evil very well, but it still creeps me out that he's in the movie at all. All I could think of afterwards was how many more people are getting the first degree in the Bacon game; it's practically unfair in a large ensemble cast like this.

My complaint with the movie is that I felt like some things were a bit rushed; they could have developed the friendship between Magneto and Xavier more-so. I wanted them to explore that dynamic a bit more; instead we get a couple of training montages and too many scenes with Emma Frost. Alright, this is the second complaint: January Jones is an absolutely terrible actress. She plays her character in Mad Men well, and her turn int Unknown planted the seed of doubt. Could she act? First Class confirms it: she cannot. It's a real shame she was in the last scene of the movie: it looked like she was reading a teleprompter and she wasn't sure how to read.

Where do we go from here? Will we get direct sequels to this or will the first trilogy get more sequels? Will we get more prequels with origin stories? Regardless, I'm looking forward to more movies in the X-Universe. I have to give them credit: there are a multitude of X-Men comic books, featuring different teams, single characters, different stories, you get the idea. So why not do the same with the movies?

Enter the Void

Wow. Ok. That was...interesting. I'm not even sure how to get this started: do you want a plot synopses? My feelings on it? I know, let's start with a story. I was browsing for movies when I came upon the vibrant poster for this one. I quickly glanced through the details of the film but didn't recognize any of the actors, directors, and quite frankly, was about the bypass the movie altogether if it wasn't for a couple of user comments. One of them was akin to "slamming my senses" and I know that description can't be used too lightly very often. I watched a bit of the trailer - but not all of it, because there is no time in today's ADD world - and decided to give the movie a shot. At the very least, it promised interesting visuals. Little did I know what I was getting into. The one line plot description: a drug dealing teen in Japan is killed, after which he comes back as a ghost to watch over his sister.

Seems simple enough; for all I know I was going to be watching the sequel to Ghost Dad, minus the Cosby. Instead I get something that is almost unbearable to watch (as I'm sure Ghost Dad was) but has me thinking about constantly afterwards. In fact, the first night had me putting the movie on, looking at the runtime of two hours and forty one minutes, me shocked and worried, then turning the movie off after fifty minutes. The movie opens with the full credits, but flashing by you so quickly you may think you will develop epilepsy. There's lots of flashing lights and motion sickness inducing camera work here. Then the movie begins. What happened in those fifty minutes?

We're introduced to Oscar, the drug dealing teen, and his sister. They seem to be enjoying themselves in Japan in his apartment, when his sister leaves for work and Oscar decides to get high. On what, I'm not sure. They talk about this drug that is so apparently fantastic that it emulates death: you'll see the greatest show in the brief moments before your die, and you can reproduce this with the drug. Oscar takes the drug, but it just seems to put him to sleep and give him that "regular high" we see in movies all the time. He goes out with a friend, to drop off drugs, and is subsequently killed, but not before we get some more insight on the philosophies of death.

So when Oscar dies, the movie gets all crazy. I should point out that the entire first part of the film - nay, the entire film - is from the perspective of Oscar, whether it's in his human form or his out of body ghost. We slowly float above his dead body then begin moving across the city, seeking out the people he knew as they learn about his demise. We float through buildings, zoom in and back out, and all over. We examine objects of interest and move again. The special effects achievement here is the seamlessness of the spiritual travel, but what we really have is a ton of CGI. We're also treated to a ton of flashbacks, presumably, you're life flashing before your eyes. But what's really going on is the character development: we get to see how the two siblings grew up and why they are the way they are. Like a series of Lost episodes, the flashbacks don't seem to be in any coherent order until you're finished the movie and have the complete story. This takes us past the fifty minutes, of course.

The next night I would continue to watch the movie, although I was fully prepared to distract myself with laptop in hand. To talk more about the movie would be to discuss the end of the movie, so prepare yourself (I don't feel like it's really spoiling). The last hour of the film is like that incredibly long stretch of psychedelic imagery in 2001: A Space Odyssey. If you didn't get that, you won't get this (I didn't). As I interpret it, Oscar is learning about the things you can do in death: you can time travel through your memories, watching yourself and others. He can search beyond his memory; he can enter a living person's mind and experience what they are doing (which is always having sex in this film). But the camera moves so deliberately slowly you don't get any emotion out of it: Oscar is not enjoying it, he's not fearing it. He just is. You, the viewer, are left to fill in his emotion.

In fact, he goes exploring to such a degree that you end up with one of the most disturbing things I've ever seen on screen, and that part, I won't spoil for you. And as I watched, I came upon this incredibly disturbing (for different reasons) part where Oscar is resurrected. Indeed, they mention it at the beginning of the film as one of the paths death can take - the other is presumably what we are viewing. Since it's in first person perspective, you get this odd feeling. His sister looks at him and gets upset: something is not right with him; he doesn't speak but reaches out physically, creepily. It's not right because it's YOU who she is talking about now. It's like the viewer has been supplanted and reincarnated into Oscar's body, but you're just a poser. Then the camera fades back and black, showing that it was his sister's dream, that Oscar potentially created. Is dreaming a product of the dead? Is it a way to communicate with lost ones?

Enter the Void started and ended with it's partial title: the very last frame you see will be "Void" and I believe the very first one is "Enter." You come full circle here and have to interpret what you just saw. Was the entire movie a chronicle of his drug-induced trip? What seems like hours and days could be just a flash in real time. Or perhaps the last two hours of the film was his life flashing before his eyes; how long does it take to do that? Or even, you could say he was killed then reincarnated, as the film ends on conception. I'm not willing to take on just one explanation, but willing to accept and explore all of them.

I thought I hated the movie, but the way I'm feverishly writing about this suggests just the opposite. Bordering on pornographic at times, this is art, pure and simple. Many times throughout the film I kept thinking that I need to put on a Hollywood movie, with it's clear edges, flat characters and stories. This movie is blurry, confusing and thought-provoking. I took the roller coaster it was and survived to tell the tale, and I'm glad for it. As a film lover, you owe yourself the favour of watching these independent, weird movies on occasion. You don't have to like it. You don't have to hate it. This movie has taught me that I shouldn't be afraid to step out of the movie comfort zone.

Enter the Void

Smallville

Apparently I have not mentioned Smallville once on this blog, and that is odd simply because it has been a part of my life for such a long time. Smallville just ended it's tenth season; back in 2003/2004 I got into this show by watching three seasons within a time frame of two weeks. Now that's a madness all its own, but the fact is I was hooked. The freak of the week episodes were tiring, but there was enough geeky goodness in there to keep you going. And that's how the show was for its entire run: it drives you crazy, every episode, but they sprinkle in some really awesome stuff that keeps you coming back. At one point, you realize you've invested so much into the series that not watching it is not an option. You're in it for the long haul.

How strange it felt when they announced the show would end. If I were to draw a graph of my enjoyment of the series, it would start out quite high, then drop down to a low near season 4 through 6, then start climbing again until the very end. On this fictional graph, I don't believe the later seasons would rival the height of the first couple, but specific episodes would certainly bypass them easily. You see, in the later seasons this show really got into a groove and found its stride: season long story arcs of real substance, with small episodes devoted to completely boring an inane activities. Some of those "standalone" episodes are so terrible they bring the average way down. There are times when the activity on screen is so awkward that I have to get up and start pacing around; I have to submerge myself in the second screen, and I have to take a break from the show. You think there could be so much greatness here, and why there isn't will drive you crazy.

Then you realize that this is the best superhero show that is on television (and perhaps ever has been). If you have the slightest interest in the DC universe you have much to appreciate here. The writers would put a dash of other heroes in for good measure, reaching a crescendo with not one but two Justice League teams and actually displaying their powers (somethings Heroes sorely lacked). They setup and delved into a great deal of mythos here, but I can't speak to its accuracy to the Superman canon. You see, I've never been a big Superman fan. I won't get into the reasons for it, but I think one point everyone can agree on is that the guy is just too powerful and because of that, not interesting. But in Smallville we have a vulnerable and growing Clark Kent. First, dealing with his powers, then struggling with his place in the human world. He has to learn how to apply them as he builds the famous Superman Ethical Code. He's challenged at every turn, and it's quite the journey when you begin analyzing it as a whole.

The series finale aired a few weeks ago, and I just got around to watching it now. I will admit, I got emotional. Ten seasons of this show, twenty two episodes a season and it's all coming to an end. It's always been a good standby: consistent and familiar. Perhaps another reason for emotion is Clark Kent becoming Superman (you know it was going to happen). The suit comes on, he takes flight for the first time (under his own accord), saves the planet and credits roll. It couldn't have ended any better in that regard, but there were a fair bit of useless shenanigans to get there: but that's always been the way, so why would this finale be any different? For once, a show comes full circle in it's ending, of course, it's easy to do in a situation like this. They could have wasted another five seasons doing great things and still got to the same point where they ended.

All good things must come to an end though, and it was time to put the show to rest. It's an impressive run really. But you want more. Clark Kent has graduated from Smallville and is now ready for Metropolis; the perfect title of a new show. But do you really want that? I'm not sure I do. I would prefer to let the memory of Smallville stand as it is; in the future somebody else will do another show with a new cast and a new take on the legend. We'll get Tom Welling guest starring in there occasionally, and I'll watch regardless because the nostalgia will be too strong to resist.

Priest

Bettany, what happened! This guy was pretty respectable, I guess, but not entirely stellar by any means. I guess that's why, after puttering around a bit an actor - not unlike Paul Bettany - is forced to star in what could be a potential explosion of blockbuster franchise insanity. Certainly: the potential is there. Priest is so obviously setting itself up for a franchise that the actors must see dollar signs floating in front of them as they skim the script. Certainly: nobody read the script.

As my friend pointed out, movies today are built with plot holes and mechanisms (such as incomplete endings) to set themselves up for sequels. Back in my day (listen to that, eh) a movie would be released, and it stood alone. Movies like Predator and The Matrix never intended for sequels; they wrapped themselves up nicely and everyone moved on. If a movie was crazy successful, the fine folks would get together five or six years later and produce a proper sequel (although they would mostly be garbage...mostly). Now, a movie comes out and they've already started the sequel; if not filming in, then actually planning and casting. Actors are signed on for multiple sequels as part of their first contract. Everybody is involved, and what we end up with as a product of this unwholesome regime is schlock like Priest.

Expectations were non-existent yet this movie still disappointed me. So why did we go see it? There were a myriad of better choices at the multiplex: Pirates, Hangover II, to name a couple. But sometimes you are just looking for something else, and sometimes you hold off on the a-list films to go see them with other people. Sometimes it's a combination of both with a hint of needing to see something "light" and perhaps more importantly, short. This movie clocks in under 90 minutes like an animated film, which is nice when you are recovering from many hours of travel and a nasty sunburn. What makes it even better is that you and your friend are the only two in the theatre: your own private screening. That is, until one minute before the projector lights up, but hey, the dream was realized for a moment at least.

I can't even get into the details of the plot; apparently this is based on a series of graphic novels and the fanboys are absolutely livid about this adapation I can't blame them. I've seen enough comic book movies to recognize when Hollywood is taking liberties and injecting their own crap. The weird motorcycles? The train?! In this Equilibrium/Blade Runner inspired city, nobody thought to check or destroy the old rail lines. Not only that, but in the wasteland - which reminds me of how a Fallout 3 Capitol Wasteland would appear on film - the rail didn't degrade to a point where it's unusable. All that's fine, but I couldn't believe the climax of the film was taking place on top of and alongside a speeding train. I'm pretty sure the comics focused more closely on cool hats, knife combat and the undead. Indeed, I read somewhere that the title character himself is undead, which was clearly not explained in this movie. Perhaps they are saving that reveal for one of the inevitable sequels.

The craziest aspect of seeing this movie was that not once after the show, where we dissect the movie in excited, quickened speech, did we mention the 3D. Purely out of convenient timing we went to the show wearing those funky glasses, and of course, it added nothing. I noticed a couple of scenes that looked very polished and impressed me, but clearly the third dimension added nothing to the experience. Perhaps we are desensitized to it, but 3D is not exciting anymore; on the other hand, it may just take the right movie showcasing the "new" tech to make it memorable and worthwhile.

Piranha 3D

Well, I did some reading and it doesn't look like this is an actual sequel: it's not the third in the series, but rather, a remake of the original. I haven't seen that one either. And seemingly, this movie was cashing in on the 3D craze, and what better movie to showcase it? It's fitting that Avatar is released just prior to this film, as Piranha 2 was directed by Cameron himself. But apparently this movie was "meant for 3D" before the whole craze began, justifying the expense of turning the extra dimension. I will make one point though: this movie has no shame, and you can't knock it for what it rips off: the movie just doesn't care.

Do the actors in the movie care? Richard Dreyfuss? Perhaps this movie was supposed to be bigger than I had given it credit. Upon first viewing of the trailer I LOL'd and had a desire to see it; the promise of nudity and crazy amounts of gore almost guaranteed that I show up. Alas, it was not meant to be. Instead, I watch this movie while eating dinner and need something playing in the background. More times than once I had to stop what I was doing and check out the insanity: what gruesome fatality can they conjure up next? Apparently quite a few, and the beauty of the shortness of the movie is that the gig never gets tired.

In today's day of age I felt like this had more setup and substance than should be here, considering I was expecting a dumb horror movie. The humour is crude and definitely not for everyone, but you have to expect that going into a comedy horror such as this. And the brightness of the movie is a nice change of pace in an age of gory movies drenched in darkness. Sure, this makes the CGI more obvious, but who's paying attention to that? My only regret is not seeing this in the third dimension.

Movie Update - May 2011

This has basically been a pitiful month for movie viewing, although all the movies I saw - save one - were top notch. Of course, you can string together the reason for the general lack of movie watching: vacation! So I'm hoping June will be more involved, and how can it not? We start the month off with a bang: X-Men First Class. There are a few big titles in the theatre right now that I want to take in: Fast Five, Hangover 2 and this new Pirates movie. Anyway, here is the list:

• Thor
• Super
• Priest
• Moon

Also of note are that all the movie titles contain one word only. Weird.